Tuesday, October 04, 2005

The Teddy Bear Saga continues

Dearly beloved, as we mourn the loss of our dear Stimpy, we must turn our attention to the future of teddy bears for the baby. Thus, dear readers, we find ourselves at a national store that shall remain nameless, placing balls of inexpensive nameless balls of thick and quick yarns in front of the baby as she sits in the cart. The lovely girl plays with the balls of yarn, and finally latches onto one that seems to suit her fancy.

Alas, it contains pink. It is not pink that is suitable for babies at least, being a pink of particular passions, but it is still pink.

Not that we have anything against pink per se. It can be a lovely color for almost anyone but myself and my daughter, who by the way had the good grace to look much better in dark or bright pinks.

It is the societal expectations of pink and of girls relative to pink that I object to.

Imagine if you will a new mother looking for some clothes for her little girl. The girl that she bequeathed a gender-neutral name in order that later in life she would not be the victim of the now-subtler forms of gender discrimation. She faces an aisle of baby clothes, wherein the basic choice, is pink which she generally despises, or blue, which she likes and baby looks good in. There is yellow but no green, which baby also looks good in. Unfortunately, she knows that if she puts the baby in blue, she will face the inevitable assumptions that her blue baby is in fact a boy, despite the long hair and other generally accepted societal indications of femininity, which are in themselves offensive.

So she is forced to get blue clothes and be forever corrected strangers by politely saying, "SHE is 6 months old, HER name is XXXX."

Bad enough having to tell everyone that no, she still had 3 months till the baby came, no, she was quite sure, yes, the doctor agrees, when she really wanted to say, None of your F---ing business, buzz off!

So alas, she purchased the ALAS PINK yarn to knit a teddy bear for dear baby girl, and consoled herself that it at least was not Insipid Pink, the color of cotton candy and pink mary janes, but Pink Passion, accompanied by equally passionate shades of orange, red, purple, turquoise and yellow.

The bear would certainly have passion. Probably a good thing since.....

Stimpy was simply too wishy washy, too subdued. Too....well....stimpy?

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